we all go thru life viewing situations thru our own eyes.. but in any average situation there is normally more then just you involved...
So there is often times a side that maybe you dont see when you are evaluating the circumstance...
tonight was one of them!
I have so much to say, so much to SCREAM back... because OF COURSE my perspective is the correct way it should go down... but no. thats not how it is. an i stand there.. biting my tongue from correcting you, and ball up my fist from slapping you..
whatever... you say what you say.. i'll say what i say...
Life does happen for a reason-- just a matter of how you present it.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
copy.paste.
The beach it hot beneath my feet... But I've made my little cubby hole in the sand in which I use instead of a lawn chair.
About 87 degrees today an the caribbean water is cool, only when you are hot.
I live the cruzian life right now. I relax in the sun, without a care on mind, sipping my cruzian coconut rum an diet coke. 25% alcohol you say? Well I haven't noticed, as my cups are 1/2 n 1/2.
I'm reading a magazine; one the I've never seen before, Combat Arms... I found an article about a marine during desert storm... Naturally, even if I have no clue about weaponry- to the extent of acronyms, I must read the article, because he is my fellow brother. The 1st line strikes my interest as he states that he is from Grand Rapids, Michigan - a place I lived for a short period of dark times in my youth...
He's on a mission, traveling thru Iraq- to find artwork on tanks and hummers. The pit of my stomach warms an turns while I get a lump in my throat. There's something about the Marine Corps that I long for.. I long for the brotherhood, the Friday nights, an the friendships an memories you make on deployment. Yes, deployments are fun- unfortunately, my husband has a different perspective of deployments then I do, as he was a "real Marine" as I like to call him... But my memories are amazing..
I read these notes an stories from this former Marines, an can only imagine that his feelings are stronger then mine.
I miss the Corps. I miss it everyday. The 0645 formations, mandatory company PT for veterans day. I'd do anything to run with 3,000 other Marines on a mandatory order.
I love you marines.. An don't think for a second that I am not going to grow old like the man at the VFW talking about Charlie... N the boys... you will always be part of the fondest memories of my brian housing group...and part of my life that could never be replaced by the excitement that the corps brought to me...
About 87 degrees today an the caribbean water is cool, only when you are hot.
I live the cruzian life right now. I relax in the sun, without a care on mind, sipping my cruzian coconut rum an diet coke. 25% alcohol you say? Well I haven't noticed, as my cups are 1/2 n 1/2.
I'm reading a magazine; one the I've never seen before, Combat Arms... I found an article about a marine during desert storm... Naturally, even if I have no clue about weaponry- to the extent of acronyms, I must read the article, because he is my fellow brother. The 1st line strikes my interest as he states that he is from Grand Rapids, Michigan - a place I lived for a short period of dark times in my youth...
He's on a mission, traveling thru Iraq- to find artwork on tanks and hummers. The pit of my stomach warms an turns while I get a lump in my throat. There's something about the Marine Corps that I long for.. I long for the brotherhood, the Friday nights, an the friendships an memories you make on deployment. Yes, deployments are fun- unfortunately, my husband has a different perspective of deployments then I do, as he was a "real Marine" as I like to call him... But my memories are amazing..
I read these notes an stories from this former Marines, an can only imagine that his feelings are stronger then mine.
I miss the Corps. I miss it everyday. The 0645 formations, mandatory company PT for veterans day. I'd do anything to run with 3,000 other Marines on a mandatory order.
I love you marines.. An don't think for a second that I am not going to grow old like the man at the VFW talking about Charlie... N the boys... you will always be part of the fondest memories of my brian housing group...and part of my life that could never be replaced by the excitement that the corps brought to me...
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Nine Days & Counting.
109 days ago Danny and I landed in St. Croix, US Virgin Islands to live out my dream of the caribbean life I've longed for...
Without realizing it, fully- I have dreamt about this longer then I remember...
A shock at first, and then adjusting nicely to this island....
It's been such a great time and gotten to live the life of vacation for 4 mths now... and now... so excited to return to the states!
I am looking forward to driving on the right side of the road... the convenience of shopping... Having friends near by, and moving in with my best friend....
Curious as to how life will pan out--- but we know we want our family soon.... but how soon? Is there more that we want to do and explore?? are there more places to go now? that cant be put on hold for 18 years? what has to be done now.... that cant be done later???
Without realizing it, fully- I have dreamt about this longer then I remember...
A shock at first, and then adjusting nicely to this island....
It's been such a great time and gotten to live the life of vacation for 4 mths now... and now... so excited to return to the states!
I am looking forward to driving on the right side of the road... the convenience of shopping... Having friends near by, and moving in with my best friend....
Curious as to how life will pan out--- but we know we want our family soon.... but how soon? Is there more that we want to do and explore?? are there more places to go now? that cant be put on hold for 18 years? what has to be done now.... that cant be done later???
Saturday, May 28, 2011
Theres one hand in my pocket--- an the other has a ring on it
What's it mean to be a good wife?
am I a good wife? Are there other wives out there who don't come home grumpy because they forgot to have lunch an tale it out on their hubby?
What is the usual- an what classifies me as high maint. ? I don't want to clean to bottom of the freezer that has rotten meat juice festering...when the dishes are really bad--- sometimes I'm not in the mood...
Are there woman out there that are pleasant- all the time? Whom have the house clean everyday by the time he comes home?? With supper almost done?
I'm not even talking about Suzey Homemaker... Just woman that can maintain their extremes...
Wives that don't lose that sex drive after they are married-- an that focus all their attention to their husbands when he is talking- bcuz he does it for you...
When we notice there is something you'd like to change about yourself, how do you change? Becoming less talkative is not like quitting smoking. Learning patience for me would be comparable to sawing off a limb with a plastic spork while being caught on a camping trip...it's pretty much the hardest lesson to learn..
And when you pray for patience--- God doesn't GIVE u anything... But he gives you opportunities to practice patience--- an unless you are paying attention--- you don't realize this is a test-- an you fail miserably..
On that note--- what if this is all just a lie? A front. Telling myself that I am a certain way long enough--- will I eventually believe it, an change??
I want to be a good Christian... An I see myself failing... How does one control their own thoughts an mind-- or dreams for that matter.. Do I have to go live with the Monks to learn to quite my thoughts... Bcuz at any given time I am thinking of about 600 different topics it feels like..
Do marriage workshops really work? How long does it take for a person to actually change a "character-flaw"?
By all means- I'm not in a crisis--- just some things I'm thinking about...
How do I listen?
How do I talk less- an hear more---
In the book of James he says...
..." be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slower to anger..."
Isn't that a lesson we should all learn...
My Pastor once said-- he can always tell a person by how much they talk.. Normally a talker does just that... Talks the talk- an does little action... An a listener is quick to work...
I'm 25 years old, happily married the greatest man I've ever met..for 2 years and 1 month.. An this man listens... An he's patient with me... He is hard working... He's not moody when he's hungry... Doesn't get pissy with me when I go have fun while he has to work... He forgives me when I'm being s dumb drunk ( which I'm happy I don't drink like I used to)
How did I get so lucky to marry the man that I wish to learn from...
But why can't I learn from him-- another thing ice discovered-- woman get irritated when their spouse tries to teach them something....
Just some thoughts.. Leave a comment if you have answers ;0)
am I a good wife? Are there other wives out there who don't come home grumpy because they forgot to have lunch an tale it out on their hubby?
What is the usual- an what classifies me as high maint. ? I don't want to clean to bottom of the freezer that has rotten meat juice festering...when the dishes are really bad--- sometimes I'm not in the mood...
Are there woman out there that are pleasant- all the time? Whom have the house clean everyday by the time he comes home?? With supper almost done?
I'm not even talking about Suzey Homemaker... Just woman that can maintain their extremes...
Wives that don't lose that sex drive after they are married-- an that focus all their attention to their husbands when he is talking- bcuz he does it for you...
When we notice there is something you'd like to change about yourself, how do you change? Becoming less talkative is not like quitting smoking. Learning patience for me would be comparable to sawing off a limb with a plastic spork while being caught on a camping trip...it's pretty much the hardest lesson to learn..
And when you pray for patience--- God doesn't GIVE u anything... But he gives you opportunities to practice patience--- an unless you are paying attention--- you don't realize this is a test-- an you fail miserably..
On that note--- what if this is all just a lie? A front. Telling myself that I am a certain way long enough--- will I eventually believe it, an change??
I want to be a good Christian... An I see myself failing... How does one control their own thoughts an mind-- or dreams for that matter.. Do I have to go live with the Monks to learn to quite my thoughts... Bcuz at any given time I am thinking of about 600 different topics it feels like..
Do marriage workshops really work? How long does it take for a person to actually change a "character-flaw"?
By all means- I'm not in a crisis--- just some things I'm thinking about...
How do I listen?
How do I talk less- an hear more---
In the book of James he says...
..." be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slower to anger..."
Isn't that a lesson we should all learn...
My Pastor once said-- he can always tell a person by how much they talk.. Normally a talker does just that... Talks the talk- an does little action... An a listener is quick to work...
I'm 25 years old, happily married the greatest man I've ever met..for 2 years and 1 month.. An this man listens... An he's patient with me... He is hard working... He's not moody when he's hungry... Doesn't get pissy with me when I go have fun while he has to work... He forgives me when I'm being s dumb drunk ( which I'm happy I don't drink like I used to)
How did I get so lucky to marry the man that I wish to learn from...
But why can't I learn from him-- another thing ice discovered-- woman get irritated when their spouse tries to teach them something....
Just some thoughts.. Leave a comment if you have answers ;0)
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
...
Wow- I just wrote an entire blog via my iPhone completely exploiting my inner conceded self... An it got erased before I could post it...
Strange.
Strange.
Monday, May 23, 2011
meh.
Today I feel meh.
I am work 10 x's slower then normal.. but considering who is writing this blog--- the bar is set low for my set standard of work ethic..
We have bridal parties that come in... spend 40 $ of champagne and oj... an have 2 drinks an leave it here....
......
I feel hung over.. and i did everything i could to drink a ton of water last night....
didnt matter...
the effect are still the same.. at this rate i should have gotten wasted.. but- trying to practice my Christianity --- i am making an honest effort to control my consumption.. but sometimes--- i dont even notice and my bottle of red is empty.. ??? how did this happen???
rekindling old friendships is a skill that requires you to be able to have an interesting enough life currently to be able to talk about anything--- besides all the same stories from high school..
recently-- an old friend whom i have not cared for for years... do to insulting banter back an forth... we've started to chit chat again... an as i can ALMOST remember... there were reason behind the friendship in the beginning.. I like talking to this fellow.. only when he's being nice..
and then i wonder.. how did he get so smart? i never pictured him with lots of brains up there-- due to the fact of his extra curricular activities he indulged himself in... but he really is...
its kind of annoying-actually... because it just reminds myself that i'm retarded...
but just goes to show-- you can never judge a book by their cover....
on that note-- my day is coming to an end-- i've literally spent 6 hours on fb... someone shoot me..
ps- best part about my day... i found a new blog... yummysmells.blogspot.com
wonderful!
ta ta for now!
I am work 10 x's slower then normal.. but considering who is writing this blog--- the bar is set low for my set standard of work ethic..
We have bridal parties that come in... spend 40 $ of champagne and oj... an have 2 drinks an leave it here....
......
I feel hung over.. and i did everything i could to drink a ton of water last night....
didnt matter...
the effect are still the same.. at this rate i should have gotten wasted.. but- trying to practice my Christianity --- i am making an honest effort to control my consumption.. but sometimes--- i dont even notice and my bottle of red is empty.. ??? how did this happen???
rekindling old friendships is a skill that requires you to be able to have an interesting enough life currently to be able to talk about anything--- besides all the same stories from high school..
recently-- an old friend whom i have not cared for for years... do to insulting banter back an forth... we've started to chit chat again... an as i can ALMOST remember... there were reason behind the friendship in the beginning.. I like talking to this fellow.. only when he's being nice..
and then i wonder.. how did he get so smart? i never pictured him with lots of brains up there-- due to the fact of his extra curricular activities he indulged himself in... but he really is...
its kind of annoying-actually... because it just reminds myself that i'm retarded...
but just goes to show-- you can never judge a book by their cover....
on that note-- my day is coming to an end-- i've literally spent 6 hours on fb... someone shoot me..
ps- best part about my day... i found a new blog... yummysmells.blogspot.com
wonderful!
ta ta for now!
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