My Weeping Willow...

I have made these choices myself. Self inflicted heart-ache and pain. I know that this is what needs to happen, and I know that this is only the beginning.

Isn't it amazing how awful experiences can be, even when you are aware when they are happening? You can't even prepare yourself from your own prior knowledge.. You know the limb will break as you jump for your life the weight of your body bends until the little fibers can't hold up all 122lbs of you...but you jump anyways.. you know you are 100 feet from concrete, and it will hurt unlike any previous time in your life, but you fall anyway... you know you have to land softly and roll, otherwise you'll break your legs... But just as stubborn as a child you plummet to the solid concrete, stiff legged an all- shattering every bone in your body.. and you sat there, the whole time.. warning yourself of the pain the next step will cause... and you did it anyway...

Sometimes in life, we have to climb that Weeping Willow tree...( I picked a Weeping Willow, because it's the current feeling of my life).. it's such a sad looking tree... but so beautiful at the same time... The limbs are week an fragile, the twigs are delicate and frail... we climb an climb, hanging on for dear life, but the higher we go-- the harder it will be when we fall.. and I just took that step on the branch that was too weak...

and there my soul sits, at the very top, looking down as I fall with flailing arms..I wont die. I know there lay a thin sheet at the bottom, just before concrete -- to catch me... it comes in the form of Jesus.. an he never left.. he's just waiting for me to realize that he's there to catch me... I don't know how far I have climbed yet.. so I don't know when I'll stop falling.. but this is just the beginning... of my long journey down the Weeping Willow....

xoxoxo

glo